I’m always seeing articles about marriage such as:
- what to do to stay married
- what you’re doing wrong that’s causing all the fighting
- men bashing their wives
- women bashing their husbands
- what kids do to marriages and so on and so on.
Marriage is not easy! At all! It takes work, Everyday! It takes commitment. It takes selflessness. It takes honesty and love and change.
What? We aren’t supposed to expect, or try to, change from our spouse. Right?
Yes, in essence, man and wife are not supposed to TRY to change one another, but each one should always be trying to improve themselves.
Marriage is downright hard. It’s a true test of loyalty, love, commitment, faith, truthfulness, and honesty. Patience is tested, one will go through bouts of questioning the WHY of the marriage, and one or both will, more-than-likely, entertain the thought of divorce. This is not uncommon and neither one should feel ashamed of such thoughts.
Being married teaches a person about themself as well as about the spouse.
Marriage is a blessing, but not one without trials. It’s how the couple handles said trials that determines how the marriage will end.
As a child, i couldn’t wait to grow up and be married raising my own family. Well, I am there and I love it! Does that mean we don’t argue or disagree or stomp out the door, slamming it behind us. No, it doesn’t. Trust me, we have our days.
But we don’t give up and this is why: marriage changed me, but it changed him too.
- has given us strength and courage to fight for what we believe in. neither one of us give up easily, but we’ve had God’s help too.
- taught us what it really means to commit. we thought we knew before, but being married has taught us to stay when it’s really rough, when all we really want to do is give up.
- taught me to just let go sometimes. there’s a whole big world that’s full of crap. we can’t control it all. we can only control ourselves and we have to pick our battles. everything doesn’t have to be a fight.
- has made me a better person because being with my husband, seeing all his goodness makes me want to be better. he has a good heart, always willing to help with no strings attached, and he’s not judgmental. I want that for myself. I want to be more like that.
- how to work together. making one home with two very different people is a process because each person brings their beliefs, opinions, actions, quirks, tendencies, values, etc, etc to the table, so to speak. working together through all of these is paramount to having a good marriage. i firmly believe that marriage is hard, but it’s all or nothing.
- has taught me about love…what it really means to love another. and that we fall in love and out of love over and over again in marriage. to keep the marriage going strong you can’t ever stop dating your spouse.
I am blessed to have this wonderful man in my life. He loves me no matter what. I love him no matter what. We’ve committed, we’ve fought, we’ve loved and we’ve hated, but we’ve endured.
One of the most important things I’ve learned is this:
Nobody gets it perfect and there isn’t a right way to be married. There’s the way that works for you and your husband.
I am blessed….