Be the Change

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In general, I consider myself to be an easy-going person. I don’t like to make waves. I don’t care for controversy. I try to keep the mood around me relaxed and calm.

That is…..

….until….

I feel threatened or out of my comfort zone.

My feelings then become mixed and I get edgy….

……and when someone makes me angry….

….well, my mouth tends to just start running on its’ own accord.

However, this is soooo much worse if someone messes with my children.

Definitely momma bear syndrome.

At this point, with either my children or my loved ones, I can chew somebody’s butt with the best of them.

However, defending my children and my loved ones will come before defending myself.

For months…

..and months….

…….and even more months…

God’s been working on me.

And I have been letting Him.

I have a looonnnggg way to go, but I am making progress. I am trying to retrain my temper because the above description I gave….try to stay calm and relaxed……is a new one for me.

I have always been pretty go-with-the-flow kind of person and it takes a lot to get me fired up, but when I get fired up……that’s where the calm and relaxed fits in.

Don’t misunderstand me. I am not a physical person. I don’t like physical altercations. Tbh, I’ve never even been in a real fight with anyone outside of my sisters (as children), but my mouth has a mind of its’ own when I get angry.

So, I work on that.

Daily.

Anyway, we are taught as children to ignore stupid comments….you know, the old “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” adage. As a child, I was able to do that. Even as an adult, I’m able to do that, but sometimes, the hurtful words do hurt. Sometimes, they do stick.

These days, I’ve just been trying to live a better life….to be more of what God wants me to be and less of what the world expects me to be. This means I have to make some changes.

Changes in how I react.

Changes in how I think.

Changes in how I see the world around me.

Changes in my own actions and words.

Changes in my heart.

And that’s exactly what I have been working on.

Today, I had an awesome day.

I love my job.

I enjoy my co-workers.

And I feel wonderful for what I am now able to accomplish.

Don’t get me wrong. I have enjoyed every day of my life as a mother and a wife.

I am blessed to have all the time I’ve had to be home, raising my children.

I am thankful for every day that I was able to do that.

However, with bills that I’ve created (school loans), money has been a concern for me. I don’t feel like it’s my husbands’ responsibility to cover those bills so that has been a weight on my mind lately. With my job, I am now able to pay those and not burden him with that on top of what he’s already taking care of.

As I said, today was a good day.

Did you ever experience one of those moments that felt so right, like you just made a difference in someone else’s life?

I had a moment like that today. No, it’s not the only time I’ve had a moment like that, but…..I don’t know. It was just different today.

So…..my advice…

…take it one day at a time and be as gracious and helpful as you can.

And…

Be the Change You Want to See in the World…

because….

the world NEEDS more GOODNESS!

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