For six months now, I have been living in despair. I don’t mean so much in despair that I can’t do what I need to do to take care of me or my family. I mean the despair that is a broken heart. I am surrounded by memories of my son, but I am also surrounded by life that continues to go on.
So, go on I must.
We are very close to the season of giving. I love the holidays as it is a time when family can get together without feeling guilty about not doing this or that in their every day, busy lives. We relax. We mingle. We talk. We joke. We enjoy. So often in the midst of every day life and every day struggles, we seem to miss the little things that make up the big things. And it’s the little things that matter….
But, before I go off on that subject, I want to focus on what the upcoming season really means to me:
- family togetherness
- good fortune: I don’t mean material riches, but those of the heart
- time to rest
- a few days without running here or there, to this sporting event or that meeting
- hopefully some sleep
These last six months have depleted me – mind, body, and soul.
However, there is a change coming. We are expecting some excitement in the very near future.
Not only will my family be celebrating Thanksgiving in the coming days, but we will also be celebrating the birth of my first grandchild. My son and his girlfriend are having a baby – which I think I may have mentioned a time or two. Their precious baby girl is due on November 28. As I continue to grieve for the loss of my son, I will witness a miracle as all babies are beautiful miracles. As I continue to grieve for loss of one life, – a life I loved more than my own – my son and his girlfriend will bring life into the world.
Oh, I can’t wait to meet that precious, beautiful being. It seems our blessings multiply most during the times we feel so broken.
~ Shannon ~